crayon eater

plural crayon eaters · alternative crayon-eater

1. derogatoryslangAn unintelligent or mentally disabled person.

   His computer battery had died. As I glanced over my shoulder to see that it was working again, and I said to myself, "Fucking crayon eater."

   2019, Kirby Calhoun, Single Set of Bootprints: A Story of a God-made Green Beret, →ISBN, page 219

   2 more examples

   At least one thread devolved into a bunch of crayon-eaters arguing over whether a pistol would really “burn like that”, whether a Glock or an XD would burn harder or melt faster.

   2014 September 5, David Reeder, “Friday night gun porn – wait…what?”, in Recoil (magazine)

   We all know at least one Marine who scored 99 on the ASVAB, and we know this because he will typically proclaim it loudly, and often. Usually to try to set himself apart from the horde of ASVAB waivers and Crayon eaters in the Corps — the orange ones taste the best. All joking aside, there’s a lot of smart Marines out there, or at least, smartass Marines.

   2017 November 10, James Clark, “7 Other Honors The Marines Should Dish Out During The Birthday Ball”, in Task & Purpose

   Synonyms: meathead, mouth breather

2. Used other than figuratively or idiomatically: see crayon, eater.

   The department concluded its report with a suggested treatment for crayon eaters.

   1951 February 3, “Dyes Do It: ‘Blue Baby’ Crayon-Eating Case Solved”, in Los Angeles Times, volume LXX, Los Angeles, Calif., part 1, page 2, column 3

   2 more examples

   I was seeing colors... greens (forest greens, light greens, and other subtle shades of green), blues, gold, silver, and even-⁠-I know you think I'm making this up-⁠-even that super-flourescent^([sic]) pink. I can't help myself-⁠-I'm a crayon eater.

   1995 January–February, Desparate^([sic]) [pseudonym], “Advice”, in Peek-a-Boo, number 12, Austin, Tex., page 26, column 2

   When they discovered he had eaten the crayons that his mother had placed in his lunch box, he was stripped of the family genius title that very day. […] If he had failed, that would mean being in the same class with his brother, the smart one, the crayon eater.

   2000, David Williams, “When You Make a Vow, Honor It”, in Just Thinking, Gadsden, Ala.: B.A.N.D. Publishing, pages 50–51