it's not what you say but how you say it

proverb

The tone and delivery of communication are at least as important as the message itself.

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Meanings

proverb
  1. The tone and delivery of communication are at least as important as the message itself.

    Say the punch line loud and clear. You can even increase your volume and really emphasize the last word. Sometimes it's not what you say but how you say it.

    2018, Alyson Connolly, Public Speaking Skills For Dummies
Cite this entry
APA

it's not what you say but how you say it. (n.d.). In WatkinsX Dictionary. Retrieved November 5, 2026, from https://dictionary.watkinsx.com/word/it's%20not%20what%20you%20say%20but%20how%20you%20say%20it

MLA

“it's not what you say but how you say it.” WatkinsX Dictionary, https://dictionary.watkinsx.com/word/it's%20not%20what%20you%20say%20but%20how%20you%20say%20it. Accessed November 5, 2026.

Chicago

WatkinsX Dictionary, s.v. “it's not what you say but how you say it,” accessed November 5, 2026, https://dictionary.watkinsx.com/word/it's%20not%20what%20you%20say%20but%20how%20you%20say%20it.

Source: it's not what you say but how you say it on Wiktionary, CC BY-SA 4.0.