pick-me

plural pick-mes · alternative pick me · alternative pickme

1. derogatoryslangSynonym of pick-me girl.

   Yet the “pick me” culture, a phenomenon where some women announce their willingness to adhere to these arbitrary standards, is evident on Twitter and other social media sites.

   2020, Mikki Kendall, Hood Feminism: Notes from the Women That a Movement Forgot, page 74

   2 more examples

   Or think about the pick-me's claim that she's totally fine with how much her boyfriend salivates over Instagram models or flirts with his coworker, because she's not like other girls who are jealous and insecure.

   2024, Drew Afualo, Loud: Accept Nothing Less Than the Life You Deserve, unnumbered page

   While folklore and evermore do celebrate Swift's evolution from the "pick me" days of Fearless, the albums also use cottagecore landscapes and imagery as a vehicle for mourning simpler times.

   2024, Katherine Murray, “Female Millennial Rage: The Weaponization of Cottagecore”, in Anastasia Klimchynskaya, Betsy Winakur Tontiplaphol, editors, The Literary Taylor Swift: Songwriting and Intertextuality, page 125

   Synonyms: pick-me girl

2. broadlyderogatoryslangA person who acts against the interests of their own (typically marginalized) group in the hope of obtaining majority favour.

   Pick-mes are ideal for the role of the token minority friend since they often fall in line with racist beliefs used against their own community.

   2020, Danica Seto, "White People, Please Pick Me", Overachiever Magazine, September 2020 (link)

   2 more examples

   The most disgusting act I've seen from a "pick me" is when they'd bring others down or betray the ones who cared for them all in the name of "being accepted."

   2020 November 1, Marissa Foster, “Stop being a 'pick me' person to fit in”, in Pepperpot, Georgetown, Guyana, page 20

   A “pick-me” person is desperate for acceptance from a particular group and will do whatever it takes to gain access to certain social circles and remain there.

   2022, Shreya Joshi, "Ghislaine Maxwell and the pathological pick-me syndrome", The Medium (University of Toronto Mississauga, 17 January 2022, page 6