shake hands with the unemployed

present singular third person shakes hands with the unemployed · participle present shaking hands with the unemployed · past shook hands with the unemployed · participle past shaken hands with the unemployed

1. euphemisticslangTo urinate.

   An older man made this remark when he left the bar to urinate: "Well, I'll go back and shake hands with the unemployed." Since he was heading for the men's room I didn't get the significance of this statement for a minute or so; it was, of course, a reference to sexual inactivity.

   1975, E. E. LeMasters, Blue-collar Aristocrats: Life-styles at a Working-class Tavern, University of Wisconsin Press, pages 103-104

   Synonyms: break the seal, hit the head, micturate, pass water, pee, piddle, piss, slash

2. euphemisticslangTo masturbate.

   Why did the preppie boy make a great social worker? He had a lot of practice shaking hands with the unemployed.

   1993, Seattle Sal, Grunge Jokes, S.P. Books, page 43

   Synonyms: shake hands with the milkman, abuse, bash one out, bate, beat it, beat off, crank one out, fap